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Run 1424 |
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Date: 2nd October 2009 |
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Hares: Coo Chi Coo & No Good, Wonton |
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Run-Site: Tampines MTB Trail
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On On: Beach Hut
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Numbers: Members: 53 Returnees: 5 Visitors: 8 (incl. 0 virgins) Total 66 |
The Run by our Mystery Run Reporter: Ayam Zinking
Luckily once upon a time sixty-something years ago someone was born. His real name is not so interesting for us at the moment but in the Hash now a day they call him Coo Chi Coo.
Why Coo Chi Coo? Maybe the run was quite short?
The first runners came back after 20 mins? No, some runners need longer, 40 mins. One guy was on the trail even longer. If I remember they call him Hooray. His run was that long that it required him to take a cab back to the on-side. He is a local; naturally he must be familiar with the place? I trust him.
We had full moon and the run side is without jungle. There are no excuses for whoever couldn’t find the way back.
In Singapore on this Friday Oct. 02nd in 2009, 31°C, 75% humidity, partly cloudy, visibility 9km; the run went through several open fields, some high grasses, some trees and a few small hills up and down in an enclosed area. It looks like a bicycle track, isn’t it?
The run started sharp in time.
They had some confusions at the beginning of the run, were not able to find the track so fast. I think it’s only because of the euphoric when any competition starts. Finally somebody found some paper and they moved on.
I joined in later, not the intention to run, but to walk. So, I did.
Under the bottom line we all had a satisfied run: long and short run, walking also possible. The front runners were much energized. Full moon for the couples or for who’s who wants to become it.
All in one a good run!
Happy Birthday Coo Chi Coo - the Hare of the run!
I’m glad that you dropped by sixty-something years ago accidentally so that we had such excitements on this night!
AZ
The Circle by Half Cut
Circle began at 07.50 pm.
Wonton took up the role of Grand Mistress this evening – well done Wonton – you could be talking yourself into a role.
What did we think of the Run ‘The best run I have never been on’ came from Comes Quietly who arrived late (he got stuck at the 19th hole). (As he was carrying the wine, leaving some of the ladies having a dry argument, I am surprised he was not charged)
Tell us about your On On: At the Beach Hut – first and foremost this location won ‘The On On of the Year’ for Coo Chi Coo and No Good last year so it promised to be a great event – as his on ons always are. Along with oodles of food and a 20% discount on alcohol what more could you want.
Next Week’s Run: The Shit Family, shit run at a shit place with shit food
Virgins: None
Visitors: Trevor, Ins Wu, Ziggy, Jig A Jig, Fat Crushing Bastard, Greg, Jill and James. Kelly, or is that Knee Trembler, I understand it was reported her name was Wobble Tits (who wrote that and exactly where did that come from?)
New Members: Marie Daily joined along with Fat Crushing Bastard (a returnee). Welcome and congratulations for joining the best club in the land. Smart movers.
Do we have a Hare Whip? Coo Chi Coo, Wonton & No Good
Stash was called in for, not only complaining about the circle checks during the run but running a complete circle himself and coming back early. Well done Stash.
Milestones:
Dominator received her well deserved 100 run award and thought it was ‘lovely’. Congratulations Dominator (good to see you back – I have been bringing that award almost every week for the past three months waiting for you to turn up).
And, Mais Oui Bang was called in for her 50th run award – she was made to put the t-shirt on and take it off so many times I lost count. As for Cock Radio, when he swapped t-shirts with her, had the song ‘who ate all the pies sung to him’. Saliva was heard saying ‘if I had a body like that I wouldn’t mind taking my t-shirt off too’.
Mystery Whip: Tiger Lilly
Lacey Lady was called in for having been seen riding her bike like a woman possessed with a toilet roll stuck on the handlebars. Tiger Lily’s summation – she was in a hurry. .
Mystery Mystery Whip: Running Shit
Called in Cock Radio for giving him 15 minutes warning about being Mystery Mystery Whip. Running Shit agreed to do it on the proviso that Cock Radio could give him some material. No material was forthcoming so a drink for Cock Radio was forthcoming instead.
Sequiman was a look alike for Crock O’Shit – not sure what this charge was but Croc`k O’Shit had escaped by this time.
Chicken Shit, Strapless, Marie look-alike Sharon Batu and Dominator were called in for making lewd suggestions to each other while they were getting changed. Strapless wanted Chicken Shit to wash him. Maria wanted to know where they were and Dominator and Bully were involved but Running Shit could not work out where they were hiding.
The Prick: Cherry Picker gave it to Twin Towers
(Be warned, if he gets it again be very careful around him – he was seen at the Red Lantern last week amassing charges (and writing them down to ensure his memory didn’t fail him) to ensure he dispensed of it)
Cherry Picker brought Half Cut, Hooray, Poser (look-alike for Twin Towers) and Sharon Batu into the circle in the hope of getting rid of it. Hooray deserved the prick for a few reasons and he did top it off this evening by coming back to the run site in a taxi (he had also unsuccessfully tried to hop on the MRT without money), Half Cut was sitting with Cherry Picker at the Red Lantern so very successfully dug a big hole for herself, Poser alias Twin Towers told CP that she had a prick at home twice as big and also white, Sharon Batu told him not to bother her as she was busy picking up a young virgin. Twin Towers has it again.
A.O.B.
DIY came into the circle to extol the virtues of being married to a Scotswomen and stated how the Scots go right back to the basics. Aye Aye was called in. He had been seen p**ssing in full view and not making any bones about where he would do it. Saliva was called in for offering to assist. Down down for both of them.
Shoe Shopper called Shut the Fuck Up in for spreading vicious rumours about hashers and toy boys. We all wanted to hear the full story but guess it will have to wait till later.
Shoe Shopper called Comes Quietly into the circle, I think, for being late in delivering the wine.
Coo Chi Coo called in Siquaman as a look-alike for Boo. Boo has obviously gone home early to prepare his case against Coo Chi Coo as Boo was seen riding Coo Chi Coo’s bike before the rear tube in the bike had to be replaced. The sheer weight of Boo obviously damaged the bike.
Coo Chi Coo called Saliva in for wearing one of his old t-shirts. ‘Off, off, off’ was the call without a response.
Coo Chi Coo was called in to celebrate his birthday with a down down. But it was also noted that it was a pretty sad state of affairs that he was spending his birthday in a carpark in the outskirts of Singapore.
Peeking Ong called Hooray in to celebrate Hooray’s 27 years of hashing. He was there on Lion City’s No 1 run and has never taken a taxi back to the run site in his life. He must have been pretty lost.
Shut the Fuck Up charged Coo Chi Coo for shameless advertising (I did hear said he has a sex shop for short men). His hash name was clearly visible on the pamphlet she passed around. Down down for the birthday boy.
Wet Patch called in Shut the Fuck Up. When Wet Patch and Shoe Shopper drove up tonight Shut the Fuck Up could not contain herself and came running over, very excited, to tell them that she had met Prince Andrew, the Duke of York. Down down for the girl.
In & Out called Shut the Fuck Up and Irene in to discuss an incident he had seen which concerned ‘randy Andy’. Drinks for the girls.
Dinner and Dance:
Tickets are selling fast – don’t miss the early bird price - $20 added on per person after 25/10.
Coo Chi Coo brought In & Out in to charge him with a copyright infringement on the pamphlet for Pirates in the Caribbean.
GM Business:
All runners - the Breast Cancer Run 24th October – watch for advertising.
DYI missed, by a hare’s breathe, being charged for not returning my pen. He came dangerously close to being the first charge for the evening.
Stash and a look-alike for Little John being Astronut were charged – although I missed the charge it concerned being enormous and going off to find a bigger one.
Circle closed at 08.45 pm.
Half Cuts Plagiarism:
The Sunday Times 27th Sept ‘Reflect’ – Teo Cheng Wee
My worst nightmare is coming true. I’m turning into my mother. Not entirely, of course. I doubt her floral dresses would fit me and pastel-coloured handbags are not my thing. Yet I was doing a mighty fine impression of her last week, just days before she was due to leave for a 10-day vacation. When she first told me she was going on a package tour with a group of friends I was happy for her. It was the first time my mum was going overseas by herself and I joked that the Big Girl was growing up. She’s not getting any younger and it’s a good chance for her to see the world while she is still fairly healthy. I didn’t think I had to worry much because she is generally careful. When I go overseas, she’s so kiasu that she would bug me weeks in advance. Shell nag me to doub’le and triple check my items. So why was I on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
Well, firstly because there was a strange lack of urgency for her trip. Two days before her departure, she still hadn’t prepared anything. ‘I’ll pack tomorrow,’ she said nonchalantly when I quizzed her about it. Two days to go and nothing readied? I pursed my lips. I checked in on her again the next day. Surely, everything would be ready by now. I mean, she’s flying the next day.
She asked if I had a universal electrical adaptor. ‘Yes, yes, I do,’ I trumpeted enthusiastically, as I skipped to my room to fish it out. When I went to her room to pass it on, my jaw dropped. Everything was in a mess. ‘This is not happening, this is not happening,’ I said to myself. It was already midnight. ‘What kind of packing is this? You call this packing? You are flying tomorrow, right?’ I asked her. I panicked. ‘Okay, what else do you need? Do you have a camera? You don’t have a camera? Why didn’t you ask me? Here, take my camera. Here are the batteries. Charge them for four hours. Do you have a jacket? No you can’t take that jacket. Here, here, take this one.’ I started thinking that maybe this trip wasn’t such a charming idea. Sure, she was with friends, but she had never gone overseas without her family before. ‘Oh my God, I’m turning into her,’ I thought, realizing that this is how she talks to me before I go on my trips. What a bizarre reversal of roles. I was in a bad Disney movie.
I swear, my mum was doing this on purpose. This is for the times I made her freak out before my departures, trying to dump everything into my backpack and zooming to the airport. How ironic that I was nagging her when I always complain about her nagging me. But, I couldn’t help myself.
On On On On!
Scribed by Half Cut
Confucius
Says Phil-osophy:
Always keep your words soft
and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
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