Cock Radio, on the Kampong Couch, with Ayam Kampong

G’dday Ayam, do you have a few minutes?     

Cluck cluck!              

When did you first join the Hash?

Beginning of the new Millenium

Which one?

This one of course!

How did you get your name?

Back then I had the ass of a chicken, I danced like one, spoke like one. I had to speak like one coz I gained the attention & queries from many people, especially Harriers. I was named at Kampong Hash by Virginia Slim.  So the Ayam Kampong derived.

So that’s it?

Chickens make many sounds. It’s all communication. They cluck softly when content, chatter excitedly when disturbed. They squawk after laying an egg and they can even hum/rumble, almost a purring sound, when sleepy.  However, back then a particular Harriett (no longer hashing) felt threatened by my new presence & character.  With lack of innovation & vocabulary & to satisfy herself she named me VD ,verbal diarrhea.  In return I threatened not to return to hash.  Virginia Slim, being sweet as always, told me of his initial choice to name me Ayam Kampong so I returned 2 weeks later to be renamed.

I always knew Slim was a sweet guy.

Oh yeah, by the way in alphabetical order, A comes first then K, so it’s Ayam Kampong & not Kampong Ayam as many are still calling me such. AK = Village Chicken &  KA = Chicken Village – I am the chicken & not the village.

I see, a case of what came first, the chicken or the village huh?

Yeah, Cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…cluck…

Do you have a memorable moment?

Oh yes!  Driving Sad Bastard (now in Sydney), Shoeless & Indy Anus (now in Hong Kong) to Kuala Lumpur for a big bash, 3000^th Mother Hash Celebration run in 2001.  Unless you know the run site in Malaysia, never give yourself almost exact travel time which we did & kept going around & around the same highway until eventually. Shoeless kept opening gates and barriers just after the Toll stations to make shorter U-turns.  We partied so much over that weekend until Sad Bastard had to reduce  my alcohol content before I drove them home to Singapore from a bar.  Mind you, I was the only one alert on the driver’s seat all the way home and had a background symphony orchestra from the nostrils of my passengers & sound of rain. Great combination!  We partied & laughed so much that I eventually lost my voice for days.

Lost your voice hey, you seemed to have found it again lately, especially since the end of fasting month.

What about your Favourite Run site?

Where I can see Kampongs & Chickens.  I think none of them exist in Singapore anymore unless we get to Pulau Ubin, Riau Islands or Malaysia. 

What do you like about the Hash?

No class classification

When the Circle starts on Time.

When the Circle is short.

When the On On has no meat in the seafood, vegetable dishes or any noodles or rice dishes – they still taste great without meat in supposedly non-meat dishes. The Red Lantern is good at this & that’s why you see me at the Red Lantern On On only.

Yeah, I know how you feel, I hate it when I get vegetables in my meat dishes. Disgusting!

So what do you dislike?

Opposite of the above!

When the Hares arrange the On On & forgot there’s only 1 or 2 Malay Harriett’s that do not eat short legged species.

Yeah, give me a long legged species to eat too.

Best ON On?

Huh!…I  like the Red Lantern so most On Ons there are fabulous.  Ooops!… one recent On On which I found was great, it was at Bukit Batok West Ave 8  with the  Shit Family. They had vegetarian Lasagna, yeh!.

Yeah, must have been good ‘cause by the time I went to have some there was nothing left!

We had a small cosy circle after the food where running isn’t the only outlet these boys release their energy.  Jingle Balls blew some good sax while Croc O Shit was strumming his fingers over his strings & singing & dancing along.  There was  a great finale by Cums Quietly with 2 very sensitive worded songs.  I can feel all of you & the night, very therapeutic for all.  Lovely.

Did you feel me? Maybe I missed it?

Wrong!

Anyone you particularly admire on the Hash?

Everyone coz everyone is different yet whole as they are.  Blessings!

Thank you very much.

On the Hash you should……… always have a short run or walk trail, he..he..he..he..he….

Any food you would not eat?

Anything with heavy energy & chemicals.  Ayam doesn’t eat Ayam or any other tough meat anymore!… 

Very tender of you.

What is your favourite run of all time?

Hmm..hmm..hmmm..hmmm… I like them all as they all come with great effort although I would prefer to indicate the opposite instead – I dislike any runs at cemetery grounds.  I’m just a little sensitive.

Ok, looks like that question hit a dead end. Sorry.

You are married?

I was for 10years to a man of character, English bloke.  I started hashing 5years after he passed on.

Sorry.

Children?

All my siblings & nieces children call me ‘Mummy.’

Better than Aunty lah.

Could you improve the Hash?

I’ll leave that to the runners if they’re not exhausted after 26years of contribution.

What changes have you noticed at the Hash over the years?

After 26 years of Hashing  in LCH3, only this year the Circles have started  late & drag for way too long & the On On’s are getting real late.  The usual excuse weekly is, “Waiting for the guests list” or “Runners are back late”. 

Yeah, bring back the old, old, old committee!

Any words of wisdom to leave us with?

Smell the greens, if not the roses, then smell the earth, the cosmos, and the whole universe!

That’s a lot of smelling mate, do you mind if I narrow it down and sniff  something else?

Finally, do you follow Boo?

When I hear Boo screeching behind me, “Kampong…….” Then I realize I’m being followed instead.

So Boo follows you?

On that note, thank you Ayam and good night. Cluck cluck!

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